2020: Diary of a feature writer (III)


2020: Diary of a feature writer (III)

Not ‘equity’! Yet, ‘considerable equity’

Diary of a feature writer. “Practically everybody layman meets all requirements for that famous ‘juristic man’ that the law alludes to at whatever point makes a decision about worth the heaviness of lawful ‘sensibility’ utilizing the proportion of ‘target test’. The parcel has consistently fallen on the ‘assessment’ of what judges call the ‘sensible man in the city’, – the inquiry being: ‘will the sensible man in the city, hearing just current realities of a case (and regardless of whether he is oblivious of the laws that apply to it) accept that equity has been served?’ And possibly the explanation attorneys and judges, at whatever point they talk about ‘considerable equity’, they are consistently wont to cover that alluring juristic objective with the affirmation that ‘equity should not exclusively be done’, however that ‘it should be believed to have been done.’ Meaning that it isn’t adequate just that the adjudicator accepts that his judgment is simply; or that the legal counselor acknowledges that the court has served the finish of equity; yet that each ‘sensible man in the city’ should accept that equity has been finished”. – ‘Obaseki And The Hypothetical Jury’ (13/10/20)

This ‘Obadiah’ is unscrupulous!

“Very un-Mailafiya-like… who might fain talk yet to advance his accreditations in front of his character. What’s more, despite the fact that he apparently radiates (regardless of whether we presently know misleadingly) the God-awareness of the prophet-Obadiah, given the disgrace of his latest direct, we can securely say that ‘this Obadiah’ isn’t slashed in the commendable character of ‘that (scriptural) Obadiah’. Since clearly within this ‘Obadiah’ prowls an unpretentious scheming ness that is both other-genuine in origination and nearly past the ken of the Devil himself in plan – to touch off a battle of clans and tongues, religions and geologies”. – ‘Obadiah Mailafiya And The Anatomy Of A Name’ (Aug20/20)

 El-Rufai as enemy

“But this has always been the lot of ‘plain-dealing villains’ –especially in the hands of hypocritically ‘honest flattering’ men. El-Rufai too knows this. And maybe it is the reason that Chapter Six of his autobiography ‘The Accidental Public Servant’ is titled “The enemy of my enemy is my friend –unless the friend is El-Rufai”.  Head or tail El-Rufai has to be enemy. There is no middle ground when it comes to El-Rufai. You either love or you loath him. You are either for him or against him. You are his friend or his foe. To the latter group El-Rufai is a do-nothing, blood-baying ethno-religious bigot who is the insinuated Islamic leader of Boko Haram, the clandestine sponsor of bandits ravaging the North and the eminently priestly Jihadist leader of the invincibly marauding  Fulanis that are killing the people of Southern Kaduna. But to the former, El-Rufai is about one of the best things that has happened -or that is happening- to political governance”.   –‘El-Rufai As Plain-Dealer’ (Aug/27/20)

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The ‘watch’ or the ‘lapdog’?

“….why should the Daily Trust reporter –or any journalist for that matter- not find the meeting with Femi Fani Kayode auspicious enough to ask a former Minister, and one, by the way, with a pedigree not of bequeathed wealth but merely of ancestral bookstores, where and how he found the wherewithal, especially now that he is a stark, un-salaried, no-known-business-doing, private citizen, where in the hell, and how in the name of Hades did he find the wherewithal, to tour the country, one state after another, appraising projects executed by Governors? Why should that be a problem?… It is just a question of perspective after all. That although the journalist has a constitutional and moral duty to play the ‘watchdog’, too many alluring laps strewn across his ethical minefield invite daily to a decadent optional role as a ‘lapdog’ of the rich and powerful….how he daily navigates this minefield has always been a decision entirely his own. It has always been the journalist’s duty to interrogate especially those who hold public trust. But it is the prerogative too, of those, where they are asked discomforting questions to be forthright with their answers or maybe even to hazard ‘no comments’ at all. –‘Maryam To The Rescue’ (Sept/03/20)


 Comforters of the afflicted, and afflicters of the comfortable!

“Nonetheless the entire Media itself that would almost kill the fly of FFK’s malfeasance with a sledge hammer was still no less guilty of collective self-centeredness than Eyo’s colleagues were of group self-interestedness. Our collective anger against FFK was not only terribly a gangsterous overkill, it was ironically mis-primed and self-spitingly misdirected. Or have we ever been this collectively angry about our own ethical misconducts? We claim to be ‘comforters of the afflicted’ and often in fact we also arrogate the right to ‘afflict including the already comfortable’; but then we insist always that no one dares to afflict us beyond our ‘watchdog’ affliction. We may be dis-united on all ethical fronts of the profession; yet collectively we insist on being off the leash -to do as we please; malign, insult, abuse and disparage both kings and paupers. We do not even excuse the fact that others have the inadvertent right to cause us a moment’s discomfort”. -‘Still On The Humiliation Of FFK’ –(Sept/10/20)

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To zone or not to zone…that will be the question

“Those who cannot remember the past” George Santayana warned “are condemned to repeat it”. We are almost right at another zoning’s death-door again. And it informs the motive behind this six-part series ‘Zoning: The Next Frontier’. How much of the history of this largely unresolved area of our political experience we know, will determine how, this time around, we may handle this potentially divisive issue without the attendant bickering that had once pitched largely Southern anti-zoning pro-Jonathans against a largely Northern pro-zoning anti-Jonathans”. – ‘Zoning: The Next Frontier’ (Sept 17 – Oct 22/20)


 Skydiving without parachute

“…as Shakespeare would say: “The blood stirs more to rouse a lion than to start a hare”. Now with the ENDSARS protests, it appears at last we have now gone from mere skateboarding to skydiving –without parachute! You heard that! Our current situation –toying with the nerve elements of war- is as good as going skydiving without parachute. And as the Hausas would say ‘mu je gudu, mahaukachi ya hau kura’. Madness at last has mounted the beast. And like I said on my Face Book Wall anarchy is a complete package. It is a bouquet of all possible channels. There is always a little something in it for everyone. Anarchy is a Frankenstein monster that is apt always to forget who its makers are and who it is made to consume. Anarchy is a beast without memory! –‘Anarchy: A Beast Without Memory’ (29/10/20)

They won the fight yet lost the war

“This was the young that had prevailing with regards to ENDING SARS however would not leave the roads. This was the young that was stubborn to the more shrewd insight that it ought to designate pioneers to arrange its triumphs. This was the adolescent that had won the fights mid-air, yet rebuked pleas to boil down to make sure about the acquiescence. This was the young that had won the war however didn’t have the foggiest idea how to make sure about the harmony. This was the adolescent that should’ve been finding a seat at the arranging table giving terms and conditions for another Nigeria; yet this is the young presently attempting frantically to demonstrate its loses – even as it is reluctant to perceive the more noteworthy loses that its own tenacity had caused. – ‘The Burden Of Youth’ (05/11/20).



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